HOW TO GROW FROM CIRCUMSTANCES
Often time we hear people saying that circumstances make a person. Is that really the truth? I dare to think differently. Circumstances in an actual sense do not make a person but instead, it reveals what a person is made of. Just like a house that is built on a solid foundation is not easily pull down or blown off by a storm threat or wind, while on the contrary a house that is built in a shallow foundation can easily be blown off and gone by the same storm, so is the effect of circumstances in a person’s life.
Our happiness in life should not depend on our circumstances good or bad. Instead, we have to encourage ourselves to be happy regardless of our circumstances. I know it is easy to say right? But it is the fact, and many of us are learning how to readjust our mindsets and some faulty beliefs to a better understanding of how life works.
I’m encouraging you to make yourself intentionally happy. Try to cultivate the attitude of happiness that is not based on your bank account, on your family’s worth, on your achievements, or lack of it thereof. Because even some religions have affirmed that life does not consist in the abundance of possessions that one has. We can confirm this from Luke 12:15. And because of the lack of knowledge of the truth about life, people are dying and suffering from debts, and all kinds of pains to acquire more wealth, more popularity, and fame while drying up inside for lack of joy and fulfillment.
Learn About Life
How I wish everyone will read Mr. Steve Jobs the Apple Genius in his hospital bed before he departed from this earth. one of the things he said was that “the wealth I have won in my life I cannot bring with me. What I can bring is only the memories precipitated by love” Just think about the reality of that statement from an Icon. My advice is that we should learn to live ourselves with meaning and purpose by learning how best to live it. That we see the circumstances of life that are sapping up our positive energies, as test grounds for personal growth. It can reveal how mature and rooted we are in some ways. For instance, a person’s attitude or reaction, when the person loses something of value, can shade light in the person’s level of attachment to the object, it could be anything. The nature of the reaction can be proof of the attachment the person has to a particular object.
It will be safer to understand that our happiness in life should not depend on what we have or don’t have. success in life as humans don’t suppose to be measured by our possessions or accomplishments, fame, or the popularity we achieved or didn’t achieve.
Please get me right here, I’m not against, acquiring wealth or all the good things that money can buy, or a person working his or her way up to the top rung of the success lather in today’s competitive society. Neither do I accept the attitude of what you don’t have you condemn mentality. Not at all.
But I believe in taking time to construct our belief system by making sure that our beliefs are rooted in solid life principles. If you ask me what such principles are I will confidently tell you that it is the Godly principles. That can withstand the testings and shakings of life. God gave humans an instructional manual on how to function as to have peace, health, and happiness.
What I want to caution about is when people devote their life in pursuit and service of the fleeting things of this life and get inordinately attached to things and to fellow human beings and see anything or anyone as indispensable, or source of their happiness, that’s where the risk and the heartbreak lie.
Disappointment As Part Of Life
None of us likes disappointment, why because it hurts our feelings, it results in a setback, from moving forward in the relationship, plans, expectations, and growth we anticipated. In other words, disappointment slows down growth or in most cases hinders growth.
We feel sad and disturbed when a friend, a relation, a colleague, or partner disappoints us. We do. we feel the pain of the disappointment because the person has betrayed our trust. or By now a lot of us must have learned the lesson, through the experiences we have gone through in the past It could be anything for you, but in my case, I have learned with tears and heartbreak that it is not good or safe to put hope in man, or something no matter who or what it is. Because where our treasure is there our heart will be and where our heart is where our temptation or test, disappointment, may come from.
We might have known or heard of so many people who can’t love again, trust again, or feel happy again, it is not that they are incapable of showing real love, or trusting anyone, or being happy, but because of their bitter experiences in the past, they chose not to, thinking that that’s the best way to immun themselves from further hurts or unpleasant experience. I don’t blame them, because I got it! But believe me, there is a better and much healthier way to handle every life circumstances and have a positive growth from it, rather than retarding our growth and potentials for maximum happiness and fulfillment in life.
Therefore, the challenges or tests we face as humans are often the opportunities for our personal growth if we are cable of handling them successfully. Our happiness, success, will not be based on the details of our challenges, but in what and how we handle the challenges to turn it into a life filled with love, kindness, hope, and courage. Today, my daughter 25-year-old was giving her self defense over some of her setbacks, she made the statement saying that she had learned how to make lemonade when life gives her a lemon. I just stared at her with no further comment. But in my mind, I was like great, way to go girl!
Growing In Knowledge
The reason why we should learn to grow in knowledge and to learn from our experience or the circumstances of others is that when we learn to unstuck ourselves when life wants to keep us stuck, it frees us to make use of our positive energies, instead of being drained off. It is when we feel safe, feel better that we access our wisdom, and make use of our common sense to know what to do next, the right decision to take, and the best time to act. In one of my previous articles, I asked the question of what are the lessons we are learning from this abnormal period we are in? The period of Coronavirus Pandemic. There is a lot to learn from it despite the devastating and catastrophic effects.
Still, the question remains, what lessons are we learning from the Coronavirus and all the unprecedented impacts? But despite how bitter, how confusing, inconveniencing, the loss of lives, the closedown of every unimaginable social and economic activity, including religious activities, still life still goes on. What can we learn from that? The lesson here is that the preservation of life should take priority to any other need. The effort is to save lives, to contain the spread of the virus right? Whether it is a proper intervention or not, the end has to justify the means. But try to learn somethings from this kind of life event.
Learning To Accept What You Can’t Control
Abraham Lincoln once said that “people are just about as happy as they make up their minds to be”.Abraham Licoln.
That means that we have to condition our minds to be happy, regardless of the outward circumstances. Today, the whole world is witnessing life differently from what it use to be or what it has been or hoped and projected to be. Families, individuals, states, countries have seen and felt the sudden interruption of normal life use to be. Many people are reacting to it differently to the present circumstances we found ourselves. Some are feeling bitter, some are blaming the governments, the experts, some are criticizing the politicians, leaders, some are defending, some are distorting information, some are crying, while some are happy.
For some it could bring the hope for new opportunities for business growth, some are exploring some new grounds for business diversification, some are downcast, discouraged and flat, because of the losses, and headaches. While many are heartbroken for the loss of their loved ones. What a tragedy! This is life. From these ashes, some will rise above where they were before this Pandemic hit, while some may sink deeper than they were, such is life. Life happens, and will always happen, no matter how we try to get it figured out and plan for the future.
But as may know things don’t always have to go wrong all things being equal. But know that whatever happens, it’s you that has to choose what to make of the circumstances that life present to you. I will encourage you to learn to be happy, to be grateful for being alive, and for the opportunities and privileges you already have and are blessed with! We just have to invest our thoughts, feelings, and energy on building on and learning how to keep our heads above the water of life! Happiness is a choice.